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About  attend schools that have been closed or are being directly affected by the new coronavirus social distancing rules. Erika London Bocknek, a family therapist who studies early , encourages parents and others raising kids to focus on the 4 R’s: routines, rules, relationships, and rituals.

1. Routines

A good routine should create a predictable pattern each day for a child. But there are many ways to do that . New strict schedules may increase anxiety for some kids, especially if the transitions from one activity to the next seem arbitrary. To create predictability outside the constraints of a traditional school schedule, consider holding daily morning meetings to set priorities. Families can use that time to clearly communicate, sort out expectations, and remind one another of what’s ahead, from online chats with teachers to when lunch will be to who will do which household chores or where to go on an afternoon walk. Older children can write those priorities down to use as checklists. Little kids benefit from daily reminders about what they can look forward to throughout the day.

Several studies, including some I’ve conducted, have consistently found that   in particular is good for positive .

Even if families opt for a model that’s more flexible than what kids are used to on school days, consistency is key. For example, kids and adults should have at least  every day together. That meal is a good opportunity for everyone to spend time together free of electronic devices and other distractions. To be clear, the gathering itself matters as much as what’s on the table. These types of routines anchor the day, and research shows that they organize children’s external worlds in ways that support self-regulation, the building block of good mental health. In addition, predictable family environments help children feel as if their â€”which is especially important when under stress.

2. Rules

While parents and other guardians may see fit to reduce expectations and ratchet down demands, they should stick with the rules that matter most in the long term for their families. For example, it may be reasonable to relax expectations about tidiness or screen time. However, families should maintain rules about safety and kindness and be consistent with consequences. Children of all ages feel and behave better with .

Parents and other caregivers may want to set new family rules at this time, such as requiring kids to do more chores and share in household responsibilities. Such rules may instill some of the  that students otherwise experience at school.

3. Relationships

As families find themselves spending more time together, responsible adults should reflect on their own mood and behavior. Children don’t need perfect parents to thrive, but they do benefit from . For example, children should be able to anticipate how their parents or other caregivers will typically interact with them and how the most important adults in their lives will respond to stress. It’s OK for those adults to let on that they’re , as long as children see them coping with these feelings in .

Kids fare best when their moms, dads, and other caregivers are  when directly interacting with them. This doesn’t require nonstop attention and, in fact, attempts to sustain direct attention throughout the day may detract from adults’ overall capacity to provide this kind of positive attention. Aim instead for planned moments of focused, positive interaction even if brief and repeat throughout the day.

4. Rituals

Any special routine can become a family ritual—they are predictable and help every family member feel as if they belong to a special group. Research shows that rituals support good mental health in childhood because of the previously mentioned sense of family organization and the added benefit of family cohesion that gives children a .

Taco Tuesdays and regular movie nights work, as do religious practices such as bedtime prayers. I’ve found that rituals that  may be particularly powerful, so this could be a good time to revive and adapt a beloved ritual from your own childhood. Or create new family rituals together. Especially during periods of uncertainty such as this pandemic, rituals make it clear to kids that their families are stable and strong.

This article was originally published by . It has been published here with permission.